Greatest weekend EVER

I can’t believe  I forgot about this until just now.  Maybe this will bring me out of my blogger blah.  Guys, the most awesome thing ever happened a few weekends ago in the back yard of the About to be Smith House.  There is a church right across the street from our house that owns the land behind our house.  Every year they have a large event called “Celebrate America”.  It is normally held on the weekend before the Fourth of July, but for the last few years it has rained on that weekend so they moved it to the last weekend in August.  All their thinking and planning didn’t really pay off as it didn’t rain for the entire month of July, or any of August, until the last weekend of August.  They moved forward with the event though, and people came out, boy did they come out, on foot, car, truck bed, four wheeler, and I believe I saw a lawn mower.  The event has a car show, a rock wall to climb, inflatable jungle gyms, food vendors, fire trucks, live music, and a fireworks display at the end of the night.  It was what we in the country like to call “A big to-do”.  This year though, they added something extra special, something that we haven’t seen in years past, something that excited me very much.  They had MONSTOR TRUCKS!  That’s right, Monster trucks, you know, “Sunday Sunday Sunday, come one come all to see the monsters of mayhem, the goliath’s on grass, high flying, death defying Monster truck rally, 5 dollars for the entire seat, but you’re only going to need the edge edge edge.”  My Bride and I had some running around to do so I was pretty nervous that I was going to miss all the car crushing action.  Reluctantly I agreed to go to town to finish up these errands.  As expected, it took us longer than expected to do our running around in town.  Heartbroken that I’ve probably missed the monster trucks, we headed home in hopes of at least catching the fireworks, if the entire thing hadn’t been rained out.  As we start to get close to the house we notice that there are still cars parked on the side of the road, this lets us know that the fireworks show is still on.  It’s getting dark, but not dark enough for fireworks so we hustle to the house to unload our goods and get ready for the fireworks.  As I’m driving past the opening in the field my bride ask, “What is going on?  Everyone is standing in one area looking at something.”  It wasn’t until we pulled in the drive and parked that we saw a Monster Truck in all it’s glory, air born and ready to lay the vengeance reserved for God Almighty on some poor sinful cars.  We pull the truck into the back yard for our front row seats, roll the windows down, It’s still raining at this point, and enjoy the sights and sounds of Monster Truck Car crushing goodness.  When all was said and done we heard the announcement that these trucks are from Monsters on a Mission.  If there mission was to thrill, as the great former president George “Dubbya” Bush said, “Mission Accomplished!”  At this point I wasn’t even sure if my heart could handle the excitement of a fireworks display, but I was willing to give it a shot and test my old ticker out. We moved out of the truck and to our covered porch to watch the display as we sang “I’m proud to be an American” over and over again, because no Fireworks display in the south is complete without Lee Greenwood.  After wiping away our tears, screaming USA, and making Toby Keith for President signs, we called it a night, thus ending the GREATEST WEEKEND EVER.

Blogger Blah part deux

I'm still in my blogging funk, but I really want to post something.  I haven't thought of anything to post and then I was searching through some photos on my computer to show our photog about the area we're getting married and I stumbled across these photos.  So I thought I'd share the ridiculousness that is the soon to be Smith House for 6 pound 4 ounce little baby Jesus.  I'm sure Melissa has posted most of these pictures on her blog, but I thought I'd refresh everyone's memory.  So I hope everyone enjoys.

First here is our tree next to a normal person's tree in the back of my truck. 

And here it is finished.

People, I'm 6 foot 4 inches of twisted steel and sex appeal, and I can't touch the top of this tree...

That was just the main tree, we have a tree in EVERY room in the house, even the bathrooms.  I couldn't find pictures of every tree, but I found the Master Bedroom tree.

And the Kitchen Tree

Next one really isn't a tree, but we make a tree out of our chandelier over the kitchen table.

We put out a nice setup for baby Jesus

And we all get ready for bed because Santa is coming!

And in the morning we find that Santa Paws visited us! (Santa Paws is serious about her work)

And Santa Paws guards all the stockings to make sure everyone gets their gifts.

Maggie over sleeps every year and misses Santa Paws, but she still puts on her Christmas Colors and her Christmas Smile.

I wish I could have found pictures of my Charlie Brown tree, (it's in the office) and the guest bedroom Bear tree.  Every year I look forward to Dec 26th so I can start taking this stuff down.  Melissa loves it and she decorates from Thanksgiving until Dec 24th.  The sad thing is, even with all our trees we have ornaments left with out a spot to hang.  Sorry for the lame post, but like I said, I'm in a blogging funk.  I need help to get out of it.

Blogger blah...

So, I know I haven't been posting much here lately.  I"m sorry for that, but right now I'm at a point where I'll think I'll have something good to post, but then it just goes no where so I give up and stop writing.  Everything just seems so blah right now.  Anyone else get like this?  For the last 3 days I've wanted to blog, but when I went to blog nothing came out.  I have blog constipation.  I need more fiber in my blog?    Here is the latest blog I started, but couldn't finish.

Two days in on the reboot of 30 day Shred
With the wedding fast approaching I decided I needed to make sure I could still wear the 34 in waist pants I've ordered for my tux.  I have to make sure my butt is small enough to cash the check my mouth wrote.  So for the past two days I've completed level 1 of the 30 day shred.  Few notes I'd like to share with Jillian Michaels.  1. two 30 second sessions of push up?  Yeah, ok, alright.  Really?  I'm a man in some kind of shape other than round and I can't do a minute a man push up.  If this DVD is focused for women, I'm thinking you lost a lot of them of them right here.  I started out the 1st day doing my first 30 seconds like a man, set two of my man push ups saw me complete one and half before going to my knees and finishing like the little girl that I really am.  2.  We don't have the 5 lb free weights that they say you need, and I'm so glad we don't.  I'd probably be dead now if we did.  I mean, I had already punched 911 in on my cell phone after starting the work out night one and was ready to call for the Wife to Bee to press send if it was needed.

And right here is where I ran out of steam.  I didn't even get to my thoughts about me day dreaming of punching her in her lady balls, as the Landreth's like to say, during the squatting and punching part of the work out.  Oh well, maybe I'm losing my mind, or at least my thoughts.  I guess I'm too focused on being on a beach some where with my new bride soaking up the rays and planning the rest of our lives together.  *sigh* 

January 2nd, 2001

In my past post I put that I was in a car wreck before Melissa and I met that pushed back when she and I were going to meet.  Someone asked for what happened, so here is what happened as best as I can remember from January 2nd, 2001.  The day the Itsybishi died.
As you can see from the pictures, it had snowed the morning of Jan 2nd, something that is very rare here in the South.  I was working the evening shift at my job which put me in a little more danger.  I was asked by several people to not go to work due to the roads, but I’m a man and I knew I could make it with no trouble in my little low to the ground front wheel drive car.
I made it into work with no problems, the snow had started to melt and so the roads were kind of wet, but with the temps above freezing it wasn’t a problem.  The problem didn’t start until the temperature went down with the sun.  We started hearing reports of road closures in the area so people were being sent home.  Me, being the valuable employee that I was at the time was asked to stay to handle a few things before they let me go.  When I did finally get out of there for the night it was a little too late. 
I was on I-85 heading south from GA into Alabama.  I was just crossing the Chattahoochee River when I got my doors blown off by an 18 wheeler that was driving way too fast for the conditions.  As soon as he passed my car the wind off his trailer knocked my traction off and the poor Itsybishi started to slide.  I lost all control of the car and slid from the right hand lane into the barrier of the bridge of the left hand lane.  I hit the barrier pretty much head on and then I bounced back into traffic.  I knew other traffic was coming so I started the car back up, since the kill switch tripped when I hit the barrier.  I had just put the car back into gear and was coming off the clutch to pull myself back off the road when disaster struck.  And by disaster I mean another 18 wheeler rolling along at speeds to high for the road conditions.  The truck didn’t see me, it didn’t slow down, it didn’t hit it’s breaks, it just plowed right into my driver’s side door.  Due to the ice on the bridge the itsybishi started to spin from the collision, I spun right under the rear trailer tires  of the 18 wheeler, where I became hung.  Not sure how many of you have ever crossed the Chattahoochee River bridge on i-85, but it’s not that short of a bridge.  Keep that in mind as I tell you that I was hung under the trailer of this truck until it was able to spit me out into the median at the end of the bridge.  The truck was moving so fast that it traveled for about another 200 feet before rolling over onto it’s side.  Now I just realized that I forgot to mention that I wasn’t alone in the car.  A good friend of mine, that didn’t have a car at the time, was in the passenger seat when all of this went down.  My first thought was him.  I checked on him and he was alive, thank God! 
Now that I knew both of us were alive my thoughts were too of course get out of the car.  Drivers side door, not opening, as you can see from the pictures there was a good reason it didn’t open.  My passenger wasn’t in his right mind due to him hitting his head so I’m not really sure if he tried to open his door like I asked him to or not, but none the less it appeared we were trapped in the car.  Then I noticed that every window in the car had been knocked out, so we both went up and out of the sunroof to icy cold freedom.  I ran down to where the truck flipped to check on them.  Neither of them were hurt and they were real concerned about us.  At this time I was feeling no pain, so I’m thinking everything is fine except for the poor little itsybishi.  Guys, this little car was my life, I <3-ed this car so much I probably would have made sweet car lovin’ to it had the tailpipe not been so hot.  I’m looking over my car about to break down in tears when I see a guy standing next to me that stopped to help.  I looked at him, not knowing that I had a broken rib, glass embedded in my face with blood pouring out of my open wounds on my face and arm, and ask him if he thought the car could be fixed and where is the missing wheel?  I just knew I’d need that missing wheel when they went to fix the car.  Oh the things you think of at times of crisis. 
The ambulance arrives to take off my friend because he is still quite loopy.  At this point he doesn’t understand that he was just in a car wreck.  The EMT staff ask me if I’m ok and I reply that I’m fine, but it hurts just little bit to take a deep breath.  So the strap me into the ambulance with them and away we go.  I’ve already listed my injuries so no sense in listing them again, but my friend had no cuts on him, but he had a huge knot on his head and a concussion.
Last little funny part to the story, as I said in the beginning I was crossing the river coming from GA into AL.  GA state troopers and AL state troopers arrive on the scene.  The two of them start discussing who should write up the report.  AL said it should be GA because the wreck happened in GA, but GA said AL because the cars came to rest in AL.  This issue hadn’t been cleared up by the time I’m hauled off to the hospital so I had no idea who I needed to see to get my license back, or to get the police report.  The hospital staff was finally informed by the GA state trooper that GA took the accident so I needed to see the GA state patrol to get my accident report, and license back.
I didn’t know how badly my face was cut up, which was the main reason I didn’t want to meet Melissa, until I was sitting in the hospital and my face was warming up from the cold and I started to feel pain.  At this point I asked what was wrong with my face, why was it burning it so much.  (question to myself, why didn’t I notice the blood that was covering the front of my shift?)  The hospital would not show me a mirror and they wouldn’t let me look at myself.  All they did was lay me down and take a dry cloth to brush some of the glass off my face.  Can you say ouch?  I had to get the rest of the glass off of and out of my face and hair myself when I got home.  And in case anyone is wondering why I kept calling the car Itsybishi, it was a Mitsubishi Eclipse, and everyone said it looked so tiny when I was next to it or getting in or out of it so it was named the Itsybishi, think itsy bitsy spider…
Sorry this story is so long, but I wanted to make sure I got all the details I could remember in.

That's me in the second picture looking at the car.The people at the junk yard were talking to Jason and I when we were looking at the car and they asked if we knew the guy in the car, and that they were pretty sure that who ever was in the car didn't live.  Jason told him that the guy in the car did live and that he was standing right over there, and pointed to me.

Answers to Susannah's Quetions

Well, I left the blog out there for a little while in hopes of getting more questions to answer, but alas, there were none.  To me this could mean a few things, 1.) No one really cares so why waste time asking questions they don’t want to know the answers too, 2.) I’ve told you everything you ever wanted to know about me in my blog post, or 3.) everyone that reads my blog has already known me for a long time so they pretty much know what the answers are going to be.  That being said, Susannah and I have never met, I found her through Melissa asking me for the answers to Sunday’s Sayings so I started stalking her blog through Melissa’s blog.  She has known Melissa for a quite some time, and they reconnected through blogger, so yay blogger.  Speaking of which, Melissa has shown me some old photos of yous guys at a birthday party years ago.  I might just have to scan it and post it for everyone to enjoy.  ;)  Now, on to the Q&A.

1. Where did you grow up?  I grew up all over Middle GA.  I’m a PK, preacher’s kid, so my father moved us around quite often.  When I was born my family was living in McIntyre GA, then we moved to Meansville, GA, from there to Macon GA, from Macon to Atlanta, and from Atlanta to Beulah Alabama.  If anyone else asks me though I always say I grew up in Atlanta. 
2. Where did you go to college?  I started my long college career at Southern Union State Community College, after 7 years of Southern Union I took my 92 useless credit hours and successfully dropped out of college.  This is probably my biggest regret, but when I ran out of money after having to take the same classes over and over again at SUSCC, I decided it was time for me to just give up and go on.  Keep in mind, I wasn’t retaking the classes because I was failing them, I was retaking them because they kept telling me the class I took was no longer any good and that I had to take the newer version of the same class because something had changed.  So after taking Accounting 1 twice, then Pre-Cal, which became Pre-Cal with Trig, that then needed to be Business Cal, and the same story for my English classes, and Biology, and then other classes that I took because they told me to take, to find out I didn’t need the class.  Do you see why I gave up?  Seven years is a long time to be at a 2 year school.  I guess they just saw a sucker and milked me for every penny they could.  Who’s the goose?  
3. How did you and Melissa meet?  Melissa and I were set up on a blind date by Charity, read her at Charity’s Chatter.  We were supposed to meet on a certain day and go on a double date with Charity and her man, but I had a horrible car wreck and was in no shape to meet anyone.  After a little healing time I borrowed my roommate’s car to go meet Melissa in Winn Dixie’s parking lot.  (you can’t make this stuff up folks)  Funny story, when my roommate met his wife for their first date he had to borrow my car for the date.  So he and I both used each other’s cars to meet our wives.  What are the odds?  After a brief courtship of 10 years, Melissa and I will wed this Sept 11th.  An anniversary I should never forget, or so the posters say.  Melissa tells this story much better than I do because she remembers the day and what we were each wearing, but all I remember is meeting her and then us hanging out and talking all night at my place of residents at the time.

Pictures of my car that I wrecked, in the second picture you can see the car I was in when Melissa and I met.

Wednesday Rant, posted on Thursday

I thought up this post yesterday, but wasn’t able to type it up and post it until today.  So, here’s some of my random thoughts.
1.)    Julia Roberts and Angelina Jolie are UGLY.  Why does everyone think these ladies are attractive?  I’m so sick of hearing people talking about how good they look.  Angelina looks like white trash with saggy lady parts, and Julia looks like a medicine man shrunk her head but left her eyes, lips and nose their normal size.  If her face was a sheet of paper her features would be outside of the print margins. 
2.)    My assumption that biker chick = saggy boobs was confirmed yesterday on my way back from lunch.  Thanks wrinkly skinned biker chick for the imagine that will unfortunately be burned into my eyes forever.
3.)    Why is it that I can iron a shirt, it looks perfect on the ironing board with no wrinkles, I’ll pick it up off the board put it on, think everything is great, but then I’ll look in the mirror to brush my teeth and hair and notice that the shirt still looks like it’s been wadded up and rolled around on?
4.)    There are so many movies out right I want to see, but just don’t have the free time to sit in a theater and watch.  Toy Story, Dinner for Schmucks, Shrek, and The Other Guys.
5.)    I’ve decided that when I get to retirement age I’m moving to a Historical area so I can give tours. 
6.)    I’m ready to retire now…
7.)    Susannah did a post where she opened the floor for people to ask her questions, I’m going to do the same thing.  Any questions you want to ask me about anything I’ve blogged about, or any other personal questions fire away.  That will give me another blog that I can post so I won’t have to think of anything new to write.  (I’m super lazy people)
I know this was short and sweet, but I want to go ahead and put it out there.  Oh, and Welcome Brandy, my newest follower, I don’t know how you found me, but I’m glad you did. 
Leave me some love peeps!

And boom goes the dynamite...

A little update from the Soon to be Smith household.  Friday we went for my Grooms fitting to make sure we like the tux and we have all the right measurements.  If you’ll remember I was complaining that they measured my waist as a 41, I pitched a fit and so they ordered me a 36.  Well guess what…  My pants came in and they did not fit…  They didn’t fit because they were too big!  Take that measuring tape, in the face, in the face!  My order has been changed to the rightful 34/34.  My coat also needed to be altered.  Apparently I have freakishly long arms, so they’re having to add an inch to my 44 long coat.
Saturday we were thrown a couples shower from some friends.  It was a great time and I’m so thankful for all the friends that showed up to show us support.  We got even more goodies, people even brought me tools!  The venue was amazing, it was a barn at an old plantation house, which, FYI I LOVE old plantation style homes.  The house was turned into a bed and breakfast, but they shut that down about 3 years ago and only hold events there now.  The house was opened so we got to go in and walk around.  I so want to live in one of those when I grow up.
Sunday was a day of rest, as the Good Lord intended.  We were both just so tired from everything, me from celebrating my tux pants being a size 34, and Melissa from, well I don’t know I was too busy celebrating to notice what anyone else was doing.  We turned on the TV and curled up in the bed with the pets and napped.  The only down side to our great nap was that I missed the rain.  That’s right, it finally rained at the house.  I don’t know how much or how long (That’s what she said) but life giving water, the nectar of the God’s, blessed our poor parched earth.  Now if we can get a few more days of rain I’ll cut the grass without fear of killing it.